Last Sunday afternoon, I found myself at the S&R PriceMart in Fort Bonifacio. I was feeling tired and drowsy from a morning at church, so I headed straight for the coffee stand. I was about to get a cup of espresso when I saw that they had granitas on their menu.

Being the uncultured idiot that I am, I had no idea what a granita is. But I got the urge to try it, and of course I did. Well, turned out that it's just like a normal fruit shake. Except that it's about three times more expensive. Plus the ice is about thirty times coarser.

The first few sips weren't so bad. But soon, I was sucking nothing but air through the straw. Jesus, the thing must be 90% ice. I turned the cup upside down, and the big chunk of peach-colored ice that formed at the bottom didn't even move. Look.

Gravity shmavity. This is the stuff that makes UFOs fly!

So I carried the damn cup around for the next twenty minutes, waiting for the ice to melt and wishing that I had bought a cup of coffee instead.