Yesterday, the Malaysian government honored Lucky and Flo for their exceptional service.

Lucky and Flo are dogs. But they're not your ordinary dogs that are only good for use as food and... uh... food. They have special powers! They protect society by helping the police sniff out the most dangerous stuff known to man.

Bombs? Nope. Drugs? Nope. These two black Labradors sniff out pirated DVDs. That's right, I said pirated DVDs. Amazing! OK, so that's not entirely accurate. They cannot distinguish between legal and pirated discs. But that's not important. 99% of DVDs in Malaysia are pirated anyway, right? Heh.

Over the last six months, the two DVD-sniffing dogs were so successful in helping the Malaysian police deprive people of affordable entertainment confiscate illegal optical discs that the authorities honored Lucky and Flo... by giving them medals.

Huh? Medals? What happened to rewarding good dogs with biscuits or juicy steaks? Weird. But I'm sure that Lucky and Flo were thriiiiilled with their medals. I wonder what they were thinking when the government dude draped pieces of shiny metal around their necks. Hmm. Well, I guess we'll never know what went through their tiny canine brains.

Look, aren't they're sooooooo cute? Aw.

And their DVD-sniffing skills are quite impressive too. It's amazing how keen a dog's sense of smell can be. Just now, I grabbed a DVD, put my nose through the hole, and sniffed hard. The result? I did get a little high--ooh, spinning rainbows--but other than that, I couldn't really tell if I was sniffing a DVD or a made-in-China toy.

I guess that's why I never get any medals from the Malaysian government.