I rely on three alarm clocks to wake me up on most mornings. Yesterday, all three of them failed me.

And the timing couldn't have been worse. I was supposed to attend PhilNITS's annual general assembly from 10 AM to 5 PM. Normally, I'm not a fan of 7-hour-long meetings, but they were doing this one in a nice 5-star hotel, so I imagined that the food must be pretty good. I was really looking forward to it, and I was devastated when I woke up to a silent room a few minutes before noon. I apparently managed to switch all the alarms off without remembering a thing. Yay.

Here, meet my useless alarm clocks.

Alarm clock #1 isn't really an alarm clock--it's a Nokia 6230i. It's a nice phone, but the alarm clock feature sucks. I put it on the night table beside my bed, and when the time comes for me to wake up, the thing buzzes and chirps gently. I think it has been more effective at giving me brain cancer than waking me up.

Alarm clock #2 is a boring old-fashioned one. I stole it from my mother last year after I "accidentally" pushed my noisy old clock off its perch and killed it. This one works by endlessly repeating a very annoying tune, which is now forever stuck in my head. I sometimes catch myself humming the melody in the shower, and that makes me feel very ashamed.

Alarm clock #3 looks like a toy dragon. I saw it in a night market in Hong Kong a few years ago and decided to buy it for my sister because it's cute and, more importantly, cheap (probably made in China). My sister gave it back to me last Christmas after I asked for a loud alarm clock as a gift... cheapskate karma works in mysterious ways. Anyway, the dragon clock almost scared me to death the first time I used it. First it blares out some obnoxious music, then it shouts something in Cantonese, which happens to be the most annoying language on the planet. Because it's so loud and scary, this alarm clock never failed to send me scrambling out of bed to shut it up... until yesterday.

I put together this short clip of all three alarm clocks for you so that you can understand what I go through everyday. Enjoy.