Chickens watching Survivor: serious injury my ass

Previously on Survivor, the Four Horsemen had been cut down to two, and good triumphed over evil. Unfortunately, Stacy, who was starting to become somewhat likable in the last episode, rediscovered her inner bitch not five minutes after the tribal council.

Let them eat shit!

No food for the Horsemen! But don't worry, they won't starve to death, because they'll probably be voted out soon enough.

WARNING: possible spoilers ahead.

At the reward challenge, the survivors were randomly divided into two teams. They were then made to chase flying balls. Alex tackled Boo, who went down hard and rolled around in pain. Yay! This must be the serious injury that they promised us! After a while, he tried to stand up, and a high-pitched popping sound came out of his knee. Everyone, including the usually unflappable Jeff Probst, cringed.

Boo staggered around like a drunkard for a few moments, and suddenly, he was OK. How did that happen? Maybe they cut the scene where he took a big dose of morphine. Hmm. But despite his magical quick-healing powers, his team lost. The other team won a trip to... a shower room?

Who knew that hairy armpits can hold so much dirt?

Back at camp, Horseman Mookie suspected that Yao Ming had a hidden immunity idol, so he went through the old man's bag, and sure enough, the turtle idol was there. For a while, I thought he was going to steal the thing, and I was excited. That would have been the most evil act in the history of Survivor! But Mookie just put the idol back and ran to tell his buddy Alex. What a chicken.

The Two Horsemen then tried various "strategies" to keep themselves in the game. Apparently, no one told them that you need at least half a brain to pull off good strategic moves. The nefarious little schemes the bungling duo came up with were so lame and laughable that I couldn't help but feel sorry for them. They even tried to blackmail Yao Ming about the hidden immunity idol... bad move. The smart old man of course went and told everyone that the two kids invaded his privacy and went through his bag without permission. The Two Horsemen ended up looking like total assholes.

The immunity challenge was pretty entertaining. It was a simplified Battleship game with a shared 5x5 board. Right on the first turn, Dreamz and Cassandra inexplicably hit their own tiles. Black people suck at board games, heh. Oh wait, the racist Survivor season is over. I apologize.

Stacy won immunity, but it didn't matter. Mookie was voted off. Serves him right for messing with the old man.

Visit http://chickenmafia.com/survivor every week to watch Survivor with the chickens.